Glitterati Gossip

Giselle Still Has It

Giselle Bundchen is still hot hot hot. But why is she doing the Miley Cyrus "peace out, dude," thing?

You're A Role Model All Right

<a href="http://www.celebitchy.com/10425/paris_hilton_calls_herself_an_inspiration_to_girls/">Just Not A Good One</a>.

This Weekend's Hot Links Are Going To Hollywood!

"Stop Loss" features an "ideologically indeterminate, freewheeling sense of rage." Now that's a movie I can get behind! (NYT)

Poison frontman Bret Michaels has done well for himself, with that "Rock Of Love" show a steady earner for the celebreality channel. Not so much his drummer, Rikki Rocket, who's just been picked up on an outstanding rape warrant. Now I feel even worse about having shoplifted that "Love On The Rocks" cassingle back in '89. (Pop On The Pop)

The Olsen twins are squabbling? I don't believe it. (PopBytes)

Jessica Simpson demonstrates the proper way to exit a vehicle: Hide The Crotch! (Blemish)

Amy Winehouse: Not doing so well. (Celebitchy)

Pete Doherty: Scientology? Xenu preserve us. (Seriously, OMG)

Axl Rose: Sure, I like Dr. Pepper. (NME)

Alvin And The Chipmunks Bring Torture To Your Town

They're on tour. If you've got kids who love their irritating sound, you are doooooomed. Doooomed! But look on the bright side: At least you are not Rosero McCoy, the man in the picture on the left.

He is the choreographer for the Chipmunks. He has to go on tour to Denver and Chicago and New York and Des Moines with the chipmunks and choreograph them and attend their performances. His previous film credits include choreography for such cinematic masterpieces as "Garfield" and "Vanilla Sky." OK, and "Step Up," which actually had some choreography in it.

Still, my point is this. We've all had moments, whether it's sucking two dicks at once or mopping semen off the floor after a photoshoot, when we pause and say "man, this is a terrible job, but at least it pays the bills." But Chipmunks? Seriously?

Sincere Post For The Day: Steve Buscemi Is Expressive

I think Steve Buscemi is a great actor because his face is so expressive. Yeah, I know this isn't the usual snark and bitchery you want from me. Gimme a few more minutes to let the hangover dissipate, will you? Jeez.

David Beckham

It's kind of a slow news day and it's sunny outside so here's a picture of David Beckham being nice to children at a youth soccer clinic. Let's all have a smile for being nice to children.

(Yeah, spring makes me act uncharacteristically generous. I'm not even saying anything mean about his haircut or squinty eyes.)

Let's Plan Spontaneous Fighting And Links

My kind of honky-tonk: Willie Nelson's daughter kicks some guy who gets up on stage. Planned? Possible. Awesome? Oh yeah. (Defamer)

Singer Joss Stone will start acting, and she's playing a lesbian in some movie or other. I really don't care much for her, whether she's playing guitar or acting. (Holy Moly)

VH1's "Flavor Of Love" gets even sleazier. I wasn't sure it was possible, but they did it. (VH1)

The "Dinner Impossible" chef who got busted for lying on his resume expresses regrets. About getting caught. (US)

Pictures of Jack Nicholson and his moobs on the beach. He's totally become a bull walrus keeping all the hot young walrus girls to himself. (Celebitchy)

Abigail Breslin has joined the girl scouts. All together now: Awwwwwwww! So cute! (Just Jared)

LA Times Documents On Tupac Murder: Forged?

Oops.

2-3 Million Copies Of People Magazine

Jossip says J-Lo's baby pictures moved 2-3 million copies of People. Three possibilities: They lost a ton of money on the deal, they have a much higher profit margin than anyone could possibly imagine, or they didn't pay that reported six million dollars for the pictures.

Seriously, Go To Rehab

OutKast's manager, Chase Tatum, has just died of an apparent overdose. He used to be a pro wrestler, and that led to back problems (the games are fixed, but the injuries are real), which led to a painkiller dependency, which has now lead to death. His father said he was just about to go into rehab.

This follows last week's death, also by apparent overdose, of Jason Rae, the Haggis Horns performer and husband of Corrine Bailey Rae.

And of course that follows the relatively recent death of Heath Ledger, and the various deaths and near-death experiences of Amy Winehouse, Pete Doherty, and hundreds and thousands of nonfamous people. 

I'm all for partying and so on, but seriously, folks: Step away from the scag.